45°人生不快乐？4个方法让你状态舒展

<div data-page-id="CvC1d7kHoo2W7lxgDxecncNunMf" data-docx-has-block-data="false"><p style="white-space:pre;"><strong>对应类目</strong>：【情绪压力】</p><p style="white-space:pre;"><br/></p><div style="white-space:pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-JIaudWAOMoKoUoxG4WbcmAWendd">“我熬夜学习也考不过那些学霸，真是烦恼啊！”</div><div style="white-space:pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-ZwmYdGkCQoC0K6x4EPQcXTaBnVc">“周围人爱情事业双丰收，而我一成不变，没什么乐趣或成就可言。”</div><p style="white-space:pre;">“看着别人的工作‘钱多事少离家近’，我羡慕得流泪，然后继续加班……”</p><p style="white-space:pre;"><br/></p><p style="white-space:pre;">可能我们都会有过类似的想法，不太满意自己的现状，想要奋力行动又难以平衡不良心态。想躺平，可缺少勇气和底气，于是<strong>半躺半卷，一不小心就处在45°状态</strong>。</p><p style="white-space:pre;"><br/></p><p style="white-space: pre;">也许此刻，你正在为一些失误反复折磨自己，也可能在为将要到来的考验而惴惴不安，很想让自己更加自洽，让自己停止内耗。<strong>在45°仰卧起坐式的人生里，找到让自己更舒心的自处方式</strong>。</p><p style="white-space: pre;"><br/></p><p style="white-space: pre;">那么怎么样活在当下，与自己愉快相处呢？也许答案是“<strong>自我接纳</strong>”。</p><p style="white-space: pre;"><br/></p><p style="white-space: pre;">自我接纳，是接受现实自我特征的程度。不管自己特征是好还是坏，都可以客观看待和接纳自己。</p><p style="white-space: pre;"><br/></p><p style="white-space: pre;">研究显示，自我接纳对认知、情感和社会行为等均有重要影响，更高水平自我接纳的人可以较好地调节情绪状态，降低应激水平。另外，自我接纳也有助于缓解各类焦虑（例如社交焦虑、考试焦虑等），并与较好的觉察力和共情力相关。在良好的自我接纳状态下，可以有更丰盈的心理能量应对社交烦恼，更少出现社交回避和焦虑情况。</p><p style="white-space: pre;"><br/></p><p style="white-space:pre;"><span style="color:rgb(36,91,219)">自我接纳的表现有：</span></p><p style="white-space:pre;"><span style="color:rgb(36,91,219)"><br/></span></p><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-S0q8dYOqUoS4UCx4WsycDv3zntd">1.<strong>对自己的评价客观并恰当</strong></div><p style="white-space:pre;">从客观视角来看待自己，不会过度地指责自己，可以给予自己适当、合理的评价。同时能够以此为依据，在工作、学习和生活中，合理地制定行动计划。</p><p style="white-space:pre;"><br/></p><div style="white-space:pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-ZYusdgCCGoE6Egx59Brc2LxEnz2">2.<strong>能够让别人看见真实的自己</strong></div><p style="white-space:pre;">愿意让他人了解自己，不过度担心自己的状态，自然地在他人面前展露真实状态。</p><p style="white-space:pre;"><br/></p><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-TyWOdAQqSoySoexY6Tucvr5onYW">3.<strong>不依赖于社会比较强调个人价值</strong></div><p style="white-space:pre;">了解社会规则，但不会用社会比较的方式体现个人价值，不会因为个人特长、优势或者胜出而骄傲，也不会因为社会比较而自我贬低或攻击自己。</p><p style="white-space:pre;"><br/></p><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-Kk4qdyWoUoIqqIx0IMzclEQjnBd">4.<strong>可以接受自己犯错，能够为自己负责</strong></div><p style="white-space:pre;">允许自己犯错，从错误中汲取经验和教训，不断调整自己的心态和方法，以帮助自己更好地应对类似问题。在探索人生的路上，一边走一边拓宽行动路径。</p><p style="white-space:pre;"><br/></p><p style="white-space:pre;"><span style="color:rgb(36,91,219)">别担心，暂时没达到自我接纳状态也没关系，下面奉送自我接纳小妙招：</span></p><p style="white-space:pre;"><span style="color:rgb(36,91,219)"><br/></span></p><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-U0iCdUgSKoaegQx838vcOd4onde"><strong>1.专注自身，减少社会比较</strong></div><div style="white-space:pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-KaSUdKGkGo8W0axyOWDcIqbznkc">做自己的头号粉丝，每天都夸赞自己，从内而外地认可自己。把更多的时间倾注在提升自己上，可以去读自己期待的书、看喜欢的作品，也可以是学一门语言，掌握一项技能。或者什么都不做，也可以包容和体谅自己。活在自己眼中，对自己有具体的认识和发展规划，不被社会比较所左右。</div><p style="white-space: pre;"><strong><br/></strong></p><p style="white-space: pre;"><strong>2</strong><strong>.了解自己，客观看待缺点</strong></p><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-BQuAdYiUYo6kSMxYLsKc0PKYnig">自我接纳是让自己更加清醒地了解自己的优势和劣势，既能认可自己的能力，也能包容自己的缺点。回忆过往经历时，也不需要使用现在的知识经验批判曾经稚嫩的自己。</div><p style="white-space: pre;"><strong><br/></strong></p><p style="white-space: pre;"><strong>3.调整心态，设定合理目标</strong></p><div style="white-space:pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-GAE0dSGgAoEWsExqQZ5cde4hnCc">耶克斯－多德森定律启发我们动机适中最佳，该定理表明动机和结果的关系呈倒U型曲线。根据自己的认知水平和行动力，设定适中的目标难度，保持中等动机水平，能够促使我们更好地完成目标。通过完成合适的任务，可以增加自我效能感，提升自信水平。</div><p style="white-space: pre;"><strong><br/></strong></p><p style="white-space: pre;"><strong>4.正念练习，积极认可自己</strong></p><p style="white-space: pre;"><strong><br/></strong></p><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-Gwo6d4Y8aoK20kx6C5ackXqbnqb">接纳自己是个细致且庞大的概念，在45°仰卧起坐式前进的过程中，我们可以使用“正念”的方式帮助自己练习，从积极视角看待自己，同时能够保持敏感和灵活。例如，使用积极话语表达自己，通过正向语言来给自己力量；用日记的方式感受当下的自我，疏导情绪。在一段时间的记录之后，便可以发现自己的动态成长过程，捕捉自己微小的改善，自然地欣赏真实的自己。</div><div style="white-space:pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-HYmkdUQKuokmGex6Jrjcvm1hnzd">不管是45°仰卧起坐状态还是45°冲刺状态，45°都是一个可以发现和探索自我的角度。自我接纳<strong>不是说服自己心安理得地躺平，而是可以接受自己的任何状态，保持内心平和。</strong></div><p style="white-space:pre;">学习自我接纳需要一些时间，可以给自己多一点耐心，把自己当一块璞玉，悉心照料。</p><p style="white-space:pre;"><br/></p><p style="white-space:pre;"><span style="color:rgb(36,91,219)"><strong>当你遇到了难以个人承受的情况，可以向我们寻求帮助。</strong></span></p><p style="white-space:pre;"><span style="color:rgb(36,91,219)"><strong><br/></strong></span></p><p style="white-space:pre;"><strong>我们在这里，温暖而有力地爱着你</strong>。</p><p style="white-space:pre;"><br/></p><div style="white-space:pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-VM00dWwSWow0UCxWvy1czij9nnb">参考文献：</div><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-N8QwdYoKeoauq8xIDYEcs2gGnqe">[1]黄高贵, & 吴燕. (2001). 考试焦虑与自我接纳及应付方式关系的研究. 中国心理卫生杂志, 15(5), 2.</div><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-ZgqudyoyQoEKUox0KRkckKEjnub">[2]丛中, & 高文凤. (1999). 自我接纳与大学生社交回避及苦恼的相关性初探. 中国行为医学科学, 008(002), 119-120.</div><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-YQcudue82oyqw2xwjlUcgNYFnVf">[3]凌川云, 王晓爽, 黄娜, 薛宇洋, & 程淑英. (2012). 自我接纳在青少年生活事件和抑郁情绪之间的中介效应. 河北联合大学学报(医学版), 14(004), 476-477.</div><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-YWmudeA2coseKCxwPTfcmSSKnAd">[4]范寅莹, 张灏, & 陈国典. (2011). 高职院校大学生自我接纳与心理健康的关系研究. 中国健康心理学杂志, 19(8), 4.</div><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-Q4Sid88gKo2OoMx0YGscBozunEg">[5]吴志雄, 邱鸿钟, & 龚文进. (2011). 大学生自我接纳与人际信任,人际关系满意度的相关性研究. 中国健康心理学杂志, 19(12), 3.</div><div style="white-space: pre;" class="ace-line ace-line old-record-id-GgGUdweYCoOkAqxWaGucWqGCn8g">[6]张芳, 张富花. (2010). 大学生社交焦虑与自我接纳的关系研究. 学理论(31), 2.</div></div><p><span 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